The GOP Treehouse: No Intellectuals Allowed!

1 March 2009

Which one's the comedian? (Trick question)

Which one's the comedian? (Trick question)

Ah, Jindal. 

Apparently, the “Blagojevich of the Right” has an insatiable appetite for tickling my funnybone. Remember that heartwarming story he shared, when the GOP wunderkind stood shoulder-to-shoulder with Sheriff (and bigot) Harry Lee after Katrina? Turns out it is as big of a lie as the bullshit about the monorail from LA to Vegas (actually a great idea) that he spewed during his touching response to BHO Tuesday night.

This piece of news merely confirms what I’ve always suspected: Newt Gingrich and Ann Coulter descended from the heavens and daintily placed a gilded halo on the Jindster’s coiffed cabeza. Jindal is the GOP’s chosen one, and rather than cast off the shackles of dirty Rovian politics, Steele’s Republican party will attempt to swift-boat his way to victory in ’10 and ’12.

Problem: It didn’t work this year, and it won’t work in the future.

As much as I would love to see the GOP crash and burn through another election cycle, our political discourse would be truly elevated by an intelligent, constructive debate. The time has come to set the whack jobs free. 

The GOP had that chance this weekend at the CPAC conference, but instead decided to go the nincompoop route. On Dasher, Dancer, Prancer and Vixen! On Joe the Unlicensed, Tax-Evading Plumber and Mitt “Golden Underwear” Romney!

But “Da Man” Michael Steele did leave room for one fresh-faced intellectual to lead the way, an inspiring voice that would brush away the toe-tapping, draft-dodging, heck-of-a-job-Brownieing of the past. A keynote speaker who could bring the Republican party out of the cold, and into electoral heaven.

His name is Jonathan Krohn, and he is thirteen years old.

2009 should be another great year for SNL.

– A-$


2 Responses to “The GOP Treehouse: No Intellectuals Allowed!”

  1. Shelly said

    Like your freedoms? Don’t thank a war monger, THANK A LIBERAL! The only reason conservatives have the right to run their hate filled mouths and give their bigoted speeches is becasue liberals hae fought hard to maintain freedom of speech and expression for ALL people. Ironic huh? The Right bashes the very people who make it possible to bash them openly without punishment! I sya that ends,now that Obama is running things it is time for the Libs of this nation (which is most of us now) to send the neocons to the corner and make them stand there and think about what they have done until they apologize and change their disgusting ways! They want to act like spoiled children, we will treat them like spoiled children , starting with Sarah Palin then this lunatic kid! RIP GOP!!! HAHAHAH!!!

  2. theelectrictable said

    Amen to thanking liberals for our freedoms! And we are proud to say that our liberal weapons of choice have always been snark, sarcasm, corny jokes, razor-sharp wit and semi-lame puns rather than hate speech.

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